A sister for a purpose

If you don’t already know, I am second born. I’ve been put under an older brother and placed above 8 younger siblings. That’s right; I’m a sister to 9 people. If that isn’t a load of craziness I don’t know what is! I’ve never really given much thought to it but for the past couple years or so I’ve struggled with what this really means for me. Where is my place? Who am I to be as both a younger sister and an older sister? Who am I to be as a sister period?  Being a sister has to mean more than “Hey I’m a girl and I got myself a sibling!” right?

I know God has given me this place for a reason. But what is it supposed to consist of? What is it to mean? What is the purpose of being a sister?

I’ve ignored what this means for so many years. Infact, I’ve been completely oblivious to it. I’ve never looked at being a sister as meaning something. I’ve never looked at being a sister as having power. And if I have, it’s been in the wrong way. I’ve used it as a way to boss, to control, to challenge, and to discourage. I’ve even used it have personal lil servants. I’ve looked at it as I SHOULD be equal to my older brother and I’m superior to my younger siblings. But is that what God really wants? That may be what the world shows as a sister being, but is that what God says it is?

God has revealed to me the answer to that is no. He has shown me that He has placed me in the lives of my siblings, as both a younger and an older sister, to be used for much greater purpose. To honor Him, and serve them. He has shown me that it is more than just being there to tell them what to do, but to instead help them do what needs to be done. Instead of control them, serve them. Being a sibling is a HUGE opportunity to give of yourself for someone else. An opportunity to serve. ("You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another humbly in love.” Galatians 5:13) God made us free. And through that freedom He called us to serve Him and others with love. What better opportunity than to do so with your own siblings? Being a sibling isn’t a way to be served and please ourselves, rather it is to be used as an opportunity to serve our siblings rather than ourselves. “For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Matthew 20:28. Being a sister, especially an older sister, is more than just bossing your siblings around telling them what messes to clean up, but instead, leading them. Showing them how to serve. Showing them how to clean things up by doing it yourself first and being an example.

Being a sister should be more than just directing your younger siblings around at home, but instead, it should also be a way of pointing the way to God’s love and His glory. Encourage them to strive for a relationship with Christ. Show them through your own life the greatness of being close to the Lord. As an older sibling I know my siblings look up to me. I know they watch me each and everyday. What a perfect opportunity for me to show them the light of the Lord in my life! Instead of showing them how to cause trouble and disobey my parents, shouldn't I be teaching them to love the Lord and to honor my parents?

 

God has shown me it’s more than just being their sister, but also being their friend. Their best friend. Picking them up, encouraging them, enjoying them, spending time with them, and loving them. Being a sister means showing love, and compassion. Showing sensitivity to their hurts. Giving them a hand, or a heart. Listening, opening up, guiding. Being a sister should mean looking up to my older brother and showing him respect and love, not striving to be better than him. As a sister, I should be showing by example what my brothers should be looking for in a wife, not showing them that women are nightmares. As an older sister I should be teaching my sisters what it means to be a lady and what it means to follow after God’s own heart, not competing and arguing with them. Instead of investing in myself, I should be investing in them. Being a sister should mean taking the time to pray with,  pray over, and pray for my siblings.

Being a sister to me no longer means just sharing the same last name and living with a bunch of kids everyday. Instead, it now means investing in their lives. Serving them, helping them, encouraging them, praying for them, leading them. Giving them the gift of friendship. God has called me to something greater. He didn’t intend for me to take being a sister for granted. Or to use it to mistreat my siblings. But instead, to be used for His purpose. For His glory. To advance His kingdom.

 I’ve gone through the years learning it’s not easy being a sister. Both a younger and an older one. I’ve learned it’s not always easy having an older brother who constantly challenges your patience and puts you to the test. Or having 5 yay-who younger brothers constantly pushing me closer to becoming a mad woman. I’ve learned it’s not always easy coming to an agreement with 2 stubborn sisters. Or having the next spot in line to change diapers when mom and dad aren’t around.  I’ve learned whatever difficulty being a sister of 9 can bring. But I’ve also learned through the difficulties what it’s like to have best friends, and cuddle buddies, and hunting partners. I’ve gotten the opportunity to see sweet babies become toddlers. I’ve watched them grow taller and develop personalities. I’ve gotten the opportunity to do makeup and hair with my sisters, and go fishing with my brothers. I’ve been blessed. You can’t tell me there isn’t meaning and purpose in being a sister, because I have learned firsthand that isn’t true.

I know I am FAR from being the sister I need to be. The reason I am writing this is because God has pointed out to me just how far that is. I need God and I need His grace. I need a thousand second chances. I need help, guidance, and prayer. So pray for me. And pray with me! Pray for me to be the person I need to be in my siblings lives and pray for all those other sisters out there. Walk along side me. Take on the purpose of being a sister with me. Challenge yourself to be the sister God wants you to be. The sister your siblings need you to be. See what it is God is calling you to be as a sister. I know being a sister is not to be taken lightly, but to be looked upon as a gift from God. A gift that has purpose. A purpose that needs prayer and guidance and discipline.

I know God made me a sister for a reason. And each day He is gives me an opportunity to strive even closer to what He means for that to be. He is a loving, guiding Father full of second chances and I’m blessed to be loved by Him. I’m so glad He has placed me in this family. I’m so glad He placed me right where He wanted me. I’m so glad He made me a sister.

 “A sister is a little bit of childhood that can never be lost.” Marion C. Garretty